Twilight Chapters 9 and 10

Chapter 9- Theory

Didn't we go through all her theories? Batman and Spiderman, etc., even though they don't share superpowers with Edward?

I honestly don't remember this book being as stupid as it is. I do however, remember thinking it was too lacklustre to want to read the sequel.

Heidi read this first, and I remember her telling me repeatedly that it was so stupid how Bella had such a non-reaction to the fact that Edward is a vampire. I have to say that I would probably react the same way, but I have been so exposed to the supernatural through the internet, movies, books, and TV that I would be at ease with it. But judging from Bella's research, she literally had not been exposed to vampires. So wouldn't she be a little more frightened?

"I don't know," he murmured. "The only guess I have is that maybe your mind
doesn't work the same way the rest of theirs do. Like your thoughts are on the
AM frequency and I'm only getting FM." He grinned at me, suddenly amused.
"My mind doesn't work right? I'm a freak?" The words bothered me more than
they should — probably because his speculation hit home. I'd always suspected
as much, and it embarrassed me to have it confirmed.
"I hear voices in my mind and you're worried that you're the freak," he laughed.
She really is an idiot. If someone can't read your mind, wouldn't you be happy? Like, I wouldn't want my crush reading my MIND. That would be the most embarrassing thing ever. So why is she unhappy? I'm beginning to suspect that SMEYER DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT TEENAGERS AT ALL. I think my "Genie's sister" hypothesis is correct.

"Holy crow!" I shouted. "Slow down!"
Holy crow!

"You're going a hundred miles an hour!" I was still shouting.
Maybe he thought the car was in kilometres per hour. Some people have that problem *cough* Maria *cough.*

If Asian Pacific rights groups freak out about Miley Cyrus and her slanty-eyed pictures, why are the Quileutes not freaking out about how they're portrayed in these books? I'm really surprised that no one has spoken out yet. After all, according to Smeyer, the teenagers fall in love with toddlers.

"I tried to flirt — it worked better than I thought it would." Disbelief colored my
tone as I remembered.
Couldn't she have just said "'I tried to flirt - it worked better than I thought it would," I said in disbelief.'? There's a difference between description and purple prose.

"I'd like to have seen that." He chuckled darkly. "And you accused me of
dazzling people — poor Jacob Black."
Bella? Dazzle someone? Don't make me laugh. Most of the fandom hates her.

"No. Nothing fit. Most of it was kind of silly. And then…" I stopped.
Are you fucking kidding me? More silly than vampires who sparkle in sunlight?

So, basically all vampire lore is false. This is what confuses me: If we assume that vampires aren't real, then the lore is all that we have of them. It follows then that if all the lore is incorrect, Edward is not a vampire. I'm not sure WHAT I would classify him as. Kryptonian, maybe?

"Say it. Out loud." "Santa." "Ask me the most basic question. What do I eat?" "Milk. And cookies." "I'm a giver!" "I don't believe that!"

I don't understand! He's all, "Stay away Bella, I'm dangerous!" and he a) Invites her to eat lunch with him, b) Stalks her, c) Offers to give her a ride to Seattle, d) Saves her from rapists, e) Takes her out to eat, and f) Takes her home.

"Your eyes. I told you I had a theory. I've noticed that people — men in
particular — are crabbier when they're hungry."
He chuckled. "You are observant, aren't you?"
Um, not really. That's something everyone knows.

Have you noticed how Edward never, ever, says anything funny? Most girls I know want their partners to make them laugh. It's interesting that Smeyer is ramming it down our throats that he's the perfect man but he's so goddamn serious ALL THE TIME. I couldn't STAND that.

I quickly rubbed my hand across my cheek, and sure
enough, traitor tears were there, betraying me.
Argh, SO PURPLE. I think if Aaron Rayburn, Stephenie Meyer, and Christopher Paolini, and maybe that guy that wrote that Aragon novella got together and wrote a novel, they could probably use every adjective in existence, and then the world would explode.

"Sleep well," he said. His breath blew in my face, stunning me. It was the same
exquisite scent that clung to his jacket, but in a more concentrated form.
Oh, GROSS. Okay, we get that he's like the most beautiful, dazzling, God-like Adonis ever but DOES HIS BREATH HAVE TO SMELL LIKE LOLLIPOPS AND COTTON CANDY TOO? And why would his breath smell like his jacket? Wouldn't his breath logically smell like blood? So does he like, roll around in blood too? I DON'T KNOW. I just know that my breath does not smell like my jacket.

About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire.
Second, there was part of him — and I didn't know how potent that part might be
— that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in
love with him.
"About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a fag. Second, there was a part of him - and I didn't know how big that part might be - that I wanted to get my hands on. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably chagrined by his perfectness."

It was a colossal tribute to his face that it kept my eyes away from his
body.
Vomit.

Chapter 10- Interrogations

"Hadn't you noticed? I'm breaking all the rules now."
Wow Edward, you are such a rebel.

I'm confused about the whole mind reading thing. Edward is listening in to their conversation through Jessica. So, would be be able to see what Bella's saying? Like, since Jessica unconsciously processes what Bella is saying, does that mean he can read it? I was under the impression that mind reading only works with what people are consciously thinking. If Edward hears everything that people think, plus what people say to them, then his head should explode. But then, I said the same thing about Aro, who can hear every thought that you have ever had (a plot done WAY BETTER by Stargate SG-1, btw. Like in The Host).

"Wait!" Her hands flew up, palms toward me like she was stopping traffic. "Has
he kissed you?"
"No," I mumbled. "It's not like that."
She looked disappointed. I'm sure I did, too.
"Do you think Saturday… ?" She raised her eyebrows.
"I really doubt it." The discontent in my voice was poorly disguised.
Well, Jessica and Mike have been dating for like a week and they haven't kissed yet apparently. I don't know why she was expecting any different.

"Oh well. He is unbelievably gorgeous." Jessica shrugged as if this excused any
flaws. Which, in her book, it probably did.
Oh, you got SERVED. I also love how she's hammering home how shallow Jessica is when this whole book is about two people who love each other because the girl smells good and the guy is hot.

"I can't explain it right… but he's even more unbelievable behind the face." The
vampire who wanted to be good — who ran around saving people's lives so he
wouldn't be a monster… I stared toward the front of the room.
Cuz that's never been done before by Forever Knight, Angel, Blood Ties, or The Dresden Files.

http://www.eclipsebeauty.com/wax/images/wx_suply.jpg
That's the colour of Edward's eyes, as stated over and over for the benefit of the stupid readers who don't get it the first time. It's kind of like puke coloured? Or maybe the urine of someone with kidney disease. Now THAT'S sexy.

"Well, look at me," I said, unnecessarily as he was already staring. "I'm
absolutely ordinary — well, except for bad things like all the near-death
experiences and being so clumsy that I'm almost disabled. And look at you." I
waved my hand toward him and all his bewildering perfection.
His brow creased angrily for a moment, then smoothed as his eyes took on a
knowing look. "You don't see yourself very clearly, you know. I'll admit you're
dead-on about the bad things," he chuckled blackly, "but you didn't hear what
every human male in this school was thinking on your first day."
I blinked, astonished. "I don't believe it…" I mumbled to myself.
"Trust me just this once — you are the opposite of ordinary."
Yup, that Bella is just a plain, ordinary girl. Oh, and EVERY HUMAN MALE LUSTED AFTER HER? I find that DIFFICULT TO BELIEVE.

Gym. Is not. Capitalized.

Let's talk about the movie again. Sometimes, I inexplicably love random characters, but I DON'T KNOW WHY. Here's a partial list:
Zane- Eureka
Doggett, Chuck, Pendrill- The X-Files
McKay, The Chevron Guy- Stargate SG-1
Bobby- Supernatural

These are the characters who come on and are accompanied my squeal of "EEE! [NAME]!" Charlie and Billy, but especially Charlie, are these two characters for me. I LOVE CHARLIE SO MUCH in the movie.

"I know," he sighed, brooding. "You should tell Charlie, though."
"Why in the world would I do that?"
His eyes were suddenly fierce. "To give me some small incentive to bring you
back."
Well, that's frightening. I have no idea why her strongest negative emotion towards Edward is mild annoyance, even when, oh, I don't know, HE DISABLED HER TRUCK SO SHE COULDN'T GO SEE JACOB.

"Grizzly is Emmett's favorite." His voice was still offhand, but his eyes were
scrutinizing my reaction. I tried to pull myself together.
I love Emmett. Emmett is another random character I love. Just book!Emmett though. Movie!Emmett was lacklustre. Although less so since I realized he was played by the dude who plays that douchey guy on 90210 and now I find a kind of campy delight in watching him.

"Oh, we have weapons." He flashed his bright teeth in a brief, threatening smile.
Yeah. Yeah, those straight, herbivore teeth are really scary.