The Host Redux 25-30

Once again, I have managed to miss my recaps and I have them all backed up. So, here we go.

Chapter 25
Compelled

Everyone did their part, and since I had no right to be here, I tried to work twice as hard as the others. I could not earn a place, I knew that, but I tried to make my presence as light a burden as possible.
Goddammit. Prisoners aren't SUPPOSED to make their presence less of a burden. If they didn't want the burden, they would KILL YOU, Wanderer. I really, really hate her.

Infodump on the other people in the colony. Smeyer doesn't care about them enough to make them three dimensional, so I'm not going to care enough to write down their names here. One thing I am going to mention, though, is that the first baby born in the colony is named - get his - Freedom. Fuck, why not just name it Apple and get it over with?

Jeb told me the occupants were afraid of me, which made me laugh. Were twenty-nine rattlesnakes afraid of a lone field mouse?
I hate self pity.

What the HELL is the point of describing what kind of sheets each room has? Seriously.

When Jared had showed him Melanie's last note.
It's "had SHOWN" you dumb bitch. Learn some basic grammar.

“You don't think your sister can be scary? Remember the time you went too far up the canyon, and when you came home late she 'threw a raging hissy fit,' according to Jared?”
I think it's hilarious when she tries to use contemporary slang. It sounds so AWKWARD.

Yes. YES! My favourite aliens:
“Well, see, they have these awesome hands.” Jamie was enthusiastic almost immediately. “Sort of double-jointed–they can curl both ways.” He flexed his own fingers, as if trying to bend them backward. “One side is soft, like my palm, but the other side is like razors! They cut the ice–ice sculpting. They make cities that are all crystal castles that never melt! It's beautiful, isn't it, Wanda?” He turned to me for backup.
I nodded. “They see a different range of colors–the ice is full of rainbows. Their cities are a
point of pride for them. They're always trying to make them more beautiful. I knew of one Bear who we called… well, something like Glitter Weaver, but it sounds better in that language, because of the way the ice seemed to know what he wanted and shaped itself into his dreams. I met him once and saw his creations. That's one of my most beautiful memories.”
IT'S THE FUCKING ICE SCULPTING BEARS! By favourite I mean "totally lame and HILARIOUS." Also...Glitter Weaver? WTF?

“Where did your kind begin?” Doc asked. “Do you remember? I mean, as a species, do you
know how you evolved?”
“The Origin,” I answered, nodding. “We still live there. It's where I was… born.”
“That's kind of special,” Jamie added. “It's rare to meet someone from the Origin, isn't it? Most
souls try to stay there, right, Wanda?”
So I'm confused. If everyone begins at the Origin, why is it rare to meet someone from there?

“It's a cool place,” Jamie went on. “Lots of clouds, with a bunch of different-colored layers."
It sounds like fucking Cloud City.
It's the only planet where the souls can live outside of a host for very long. The hosts on the Origin planet are really pretty, too, with sort of wings and lots of tentacles and big silver eyes.”
Of course they're pretty.

Chapter 26
Returned

An electric current ran through my body at the sound of my name spoken by a female voice.
Heh. Secret lesbo, perhaps?

Dammit, Pedobear's back. I remember him being gone for WAY longer, but waybe that's just because this book is so interminable.

So, the only time Melanie comes back to life is when her man is around. Perfect.

Pedobear and Kyle FREAK THE FUCK OUT and immediately want to kill Wanderer but Jamie's all, "NO!"

“Whew!” Ian breathed. “That was close. Nice thinking, Jeb.”
Yeah, great thinking TELLING PEDOBEAR TO CALM DOWN. I'm sure NO ONE would EVER think of doing that!

I was appalled–I could feel that my face was fixed in lines of horror. Jared was right–how could Jeb have let this happen? If they'd killed me the first day here, before Jamie had ever seen me…Or that first week, while Jared kept me isolated from everyone, before Jamie and I had become friends… Or if I had just kept my mouth shut about Melanie… It was too late for all that.
ARGH.

Chapter 27
Undecided

So now she and Melanie are deciding how best to die so that Jamie isn't hurt? How about NOT DYING AT ALL.

“Leave Jamie alone,” I said.
LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!

Pedobear shoves Wanderer into the wall because HE'S A BIG STRONG MAN, AND THOSE ARE SEXY.

I watched as Jared grabbed Jamie's shoulders and yanked the boy up from his crouch.
Ha, I read this as, "I watched as Jared grabbed Jamie's shoulders and yanked the boy up by his CROTCH." I was like, "whoa, that's a little unnecessary."

Chapter 28
Unenlightened

This chapter is so useless.

Nothing happens except near the end Pedobear goes all psycho serial killer and starts looking for Wanderer to kill her. Seriously. I don't remember this part being so freaking scary.

“I know it's with you,” Jared answered. He raised his voice, so that anyone between here and
the main plaza would hear. “Come out, come out, wherever you are,” he called, his voice hard
and mocking.
It's like the guy from Hide and Seek.

Chapter 29
Betrayed

But no one was holding me back now, and though his voice was cold and angry, Jared was calling to me. Melanie was even more eager than I was as I stepped carefully around the corner and into the blue light; I hesitated there.
WTF? Are you serious? He's calling to her like a psycho, and she's EXCITED TO GO SEE HIM? WHAT? ASLD;JFA;ISHFA;SDHF;AKSDHF;LAJSKHJ???????? Oh also, semicolon misuse, Smeyer. I OBJECT.

Pedobear wants to know if Melanie is still alive and Wanderer, for whatever reason, still insists on refusing to tell anyone that Melanie is alive. WTF?

Jared makes us feel that way without trying, just by being Jared.
Really? Because I think he's the most dangerous and psychotic character IN this book. I know I feel safe being with guys who go around hitting girls!

Wanderer's sick. She's getting this uncontrollable urge to caress Pedobear. Anyhoo, they kiss and then Melanie punches Pedobear.

Chapter 30
Abbreviated

Almost done.

Wanderer randomly runs away for no particular reason and like, goes into this catatonic state for a few days back in her little prison hole.

A few others missing: Travis, Carol, Ruth Ann.
Who the fuck are these people? They have literally never been mentioned before and I don't believe they get mentioned again. Damn this is bad writing.

One of those dim blue lights greeted us as we approached the hospital wing. (I knew now that
the lanterns were solar powered, left in sunny corners during the day to charge.)
I don't see how the brackets are necessary.

FINALLY, we're done for today.